We have one life.

One life to live. No do overs. No reverses. No going back in time with I wish I hads.

The average life expectancy for a woman in America is 81. For a man it is 76.

Let that sink in for a minute.

At almost 46 years old (Adam is already 46)… I am beyond middle age according to those statistics. That is not me being dramatic. That is just math.

And here is what the research says about what happens to our bodies as we age…

Energy and physical mobility start declining in our early 40s to mid 50s. The average American starts noticing signs of aging at 42. Joint stiffness begins around 45 for men and 55 for women. The average age for the onset of mobility difficulties is 53. Muscle loss accelerates after 60.

53.

That is seven years away for us.

Bucket lists. New Years resolutions. Dreams. What ifs. Someday.

One life. That is it.

How many movies have we watched… how many books have we read… how many TV episodes have we consumed about second chances and going back in time and changing things… what if we just made the decision to live in this life right now.

Three quotes I keep coming back to…

“In the end we will all become stories.” — Margaret Atwood

“A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives.” — Jackie Robinson

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.” — Marcel Proust

The decisions Adam and I are making right now (You can follow the whole story starting with I Miss My Kids) … these active and conscious changes we are working toward… they come from this. From knowing we have one life. From wanting to make it mean something. From wanting our kids to grow up understanding that you do not wait for the right time because the right time is right now.

One life.

No regrets. Learn from mistakes. Make changes.

Live. 🌍

Q: How do you overcome the fear of making big life changes? A: You remind yourself of the alternative. Staying comfortable. Staying safe. Watching time pass while the bucket list stays full and the years get shorter. Fear of change is real but regret is heavier. We have found that taking the first step… even a messy imperfect one… is always better than standing still.

Q: At what age do people start experiencing mobility and energy decline? A: Research shows energy and physical changes begin in the late 30s to early 40s. The average American notices signs of aging around 42. Joint stiffness typically begins around 45 for men and 55 for women. The average onset of mobility difficulties is 53 and muscle loss accelerates significantly after 60. These are not reasons to be afraid… they are reasons to move now while moving is easy.

Q: How do you talk to your kids about living intentionally? A: By doing it in front of them. Not lecturing… living. Every choice we make as parents teaches our kids something about what a life can look like. We want ours to grow up knowing that you do not have to accept the default… that you can choose something different… and that the world is far bigger and more beautiful than any one zip code can show you.

Q: How do you handle people who think your choices are irresponsible? A: With love and zero apology. Everyone is navigating their own one life the best way they know how. Our way is not the right way for everyone. But it is the right way for us. And at almost 46 with seven years until the average onset of mobility difficulties… we are not waiting for anyone’s permission.

Q: What does living with no regrets actually look like in practice? A: It looks like a garage sale in your driveway. It looks like empty rooms and labeled bins and a Cavapoo who has no idea she is going to Europe. It looks like sitting with your person after the kids go to sleep and dreaming out loud about what comes next. It looks like this… whatever this is… and it feels exactly right.