Every family emails me the same two names before an Iceland trip. Blue Lagoon and Golden Circle, usually in the same sentence, usually with a question about which one actually matters if time is tight. They are not competing for the same slot on your itinerary, and once you see why, the planning gets a lot easier.
The Blue Lagoon sits about 45 minutes from Reykjavik, closer to Keflavik airport than to the city itself, which makes it a natural stop on the way in or the way out rather than its own round trip from downtown. The milky blue water is real geothermal runoff, warm even when the air is not, and the silica mud masks are the part every kid remembers. Book a timed entry ticket weeks ahead in high season, it sells out, and stick to Basic or Premium entry for a family. The swim up bar and the higher Retreat tier are built for adults on a couples trip, not for a family with young kids who will get the same water either way.
The Golden Circle is a completely different kind of day, a roughly 190 mile loop out of Reykjavik hitting three stops, none of them close to the city. Þingvellir National Park lets you walk in the rift valley between the North American and Eurasian tectonic plates, which is a strange thing to explain to a kid until they are standing in it. Geysir is the geothermal field where Strokkur erupts every five to ten minutes, reliable enough that you will not be standing around waiting for nothing. Gullfoss is a two tiered waterfall that throws up a rainbow on a sunny day and is loud enough to feel through your chest from the viewing platform.
If you only have three nights in Reykjavik, I usually build it this way. Land, stop at the Blue Lagoon on the way into the city if your flight timing allows it, slow first evening once everyone has thawed out. Spend the full second day in the city itself, Hallgrimskirkja, the harbor, Laugavegur. Give the whole third day to the Golden Circle, by rental car if you want to set your own pace or a small group tour if you would rather somebody else worry about the road.
The Golden Circle is doable by rental car with kids, but outside summer, daylight and road conditions both matter more than they would at home. Check conditions the morning of and build in slack, because a stop that should take twenty minutes can take forty when there is snow on the road to Gullfoss.
Neither of these requires you to choose. A well paced Reykjavik trip fits both, one as a bookend to the flight, one as a full day loop, without feeling rushed on either.
Our Reykjavik with kids guide has the full three day routing, including where to stay depending on which direction you are coming from.
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