flipside?

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not-so deep thoughts…

In life….there are 2 sides to every coin. Each decision we make has a flip side that may have required a bit of deliberation to make it the option we accept as our choice….and our path to happiness.

Nicole and I found ourselves at a crossroads 3 years ago that required a choice that at the time was actually quite easy to make. We needed to choose between a life in a comfortable place, doing things that we were used too, or going abroad. At the time, the sheer thought of life outside the states seemed beyond comprehension…. mainly because it was….we hadn’t done it so we couldn’t imagine what it would be like or if we would like it at all. However, there was this cosmic energy that made our decision seem absolute and completely right.  Maybe it was the wonder…or the fact that we weren’t sure we were completely in love with our life at that time. We felt like something was missing. In any case, as I sit here I can say without a shred of trepidation that our decision to go abroad was correct for us.

Ok dingleberry so whats the point  of this vomit I’m reading?  Whoa….easy, I’ll have you know that this was all very well thought out as I sat on my man throne about an hour ago in deep reflection mode. Huh..maybe it should be called my reflecting chair…with a bidet…or inspiration jet….. what?!…who invited this guy?

Moving on.  When you get the balls to get out of that “comfort zone”, you start to uncover things about life, yourself and the future that would otherwise never come about. I’m not just talking about travel, but the idea of challenge. The concept that there is more to it than the mundane round and round we are conditioned to strive for from the time we are young.  Go to school, study hard, get good grades, get a good job, make lot of money, have kids, buy a house and bend over so you can sign your life away on a mini van. You get the idea. Anything that pushes your ideas of limits and shows you how much tougher you are is quite powerful.  Sorry if you drive a mini van btw….no really, I’m sorry for you.

But look at it this way. Maybe you do those typical things,  you question nothing and in turn, you may very well find happiness is simpler and less complicated. Who’s to say that you don’t right? Certainly not me (unless I’m on the reflection chair…then I know everything). If there is one thing I have learned over the past few years, it’s that happiness comes in about a trillion forms for each of us. Not a single person knows any more than the next what true happiness is to someone else. It’s possible that keeping yourself within limits (in the comfort zone) leaves less room for wants and instead, fills it with acceptance. This brings me to the gist of my thought bubble for the day. Is knowing what’s out there and how we can challenge it a blessing or a curse? Do we benefit from seeing more, experiencing more and knowing more about the world around us? When we talk to friends and family that don’t understand…..or when we need to come to a decision to settle when we know that there must be another option….are we better off?  Travel is liberating, it’s a freedom that I can’t imagine finding in anything else. Discovery and eye widening experiences have destroyed my previous hierarchy of needs and sometimes that scares me.

Nicole and I are great at change and as we approach a time in our life when we are going to start a family….will we be ok with “not change?”  Living in one spot long term…possibly not in a foreign country….doing jobs that leave our heads somewhere far off in the rear barcar…. knifing through the rice fields of Vietnam .

I’ve had people ask…”when does it stop?” to which I answer “stop what?” It always seemed like a ridiculously naive question but as I start to think more like a prospective “dad” and less like a “traveler” the question holds a bit more water. Does it stop? Can it? Should it have to?

Knowledge is indeed power but it does come with a price. Going back to “reality”, as we have heard it called so many times seems like the bottom side of the coin all over again.

I suppose I can rest assure that it will work out though.  To quote my smarty parents, “follow your bliss and the rest will work itself out”. Knowing what I do now I have to believe that to be true.

Well, if you have made it this far, thank you.  I promise not to get that heavy again anytime soon….unless there is red wine. In that case I blame my Irish Momma and Italian Papa. 😉

 

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trunks up 😉

Do what makes you happy,

Adam

How do you build a life around adventure and travel?

Intentionally and incrementally. Most families who live this way did not leap from conventional to adventurous overnight. They built remote work capacity, paid down debt, tested longer trips, and had increasingly honest conversations about what they actually want from their lives. The leap feels bigger from outside than from inside.

What does an adventurous family lifestyle actually look like?

Different for every family. For some it is long-term travel. For others it is weekend adventures close to home. What connects them is intentionality about how time is spent and a preference for experiences over accumulation. The version that fits your family is the right one.

How do you balance adventure with stability for kids?

By finding stability within the adventure rather than treating them as opposites. Routines, rituals, and family rhythms travel with you. Familiar foods, bedtime routines, and predictable family dynamics provide stability even when the location changes. Kids need consistency in relationships more than consistency in geography.

What has travel taught your family?

That people are fundamentally similar across cultures in what they want for their families. That comfort zone is a smaller circle than it feels from inside. That the things worth having in life require effort and discomfort to get. And that time together doing hard interesting things is the most reliable source of family closeness.

How do you handle the pressure to live conventionally when you have chosen differently?

By getting clear on why you made the choices you made and returning to that clarity when the outside noise gets loud. Most families living unconventionally describe an initial period of explaining themselves that gradually gives way to just living the life. The explaining becomes less necessary as the results become visible.


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