We spent our last few days in California up a bit Northwest of the city in Sebastopol. Why you ask? Well, a very long time ago when I moved to Florida, my Mom worked at the JCC. There Brandon (my brother) and I went to preschool, after school care and summer camp every summer for basically our entire childhood. I made friends with a group of people that I will forever hold dear to me. Jenifer…seen below, is my oldest friend. She was the girl who we were allowed to have sleepovers even on school nights. She was the one who I was always closest to…we dressed alike, fought like sisters and spent every holiday together. Her Mom was my second Mom and my Mom hers.
I haven’t seen Jen in more than 5 years and before that it may have been for lunch here and there, but not much since high school. Adam and I spent two amazing days up in Sebastopol with Jen, her finance’ Josh, her most adorable little baby girl Harper, her Mom Liza, her brother Trent and our other dear friend Ivy.
At first I was very nervous driving up. I was concerned Adam was going to feel out of place or really like he married a maniac…we tend to laugh like crazy when we are together. I wasn’t sure how or if we would be able to jump back in where we left off. I actually had butterflies in my tummy. When we pulled up and saw each other, it was as if no time had passed. Ivy, Jen, Liza and I went straight to talking, laughing, catching up and eating delicious treats. Harper was a little Gem and is amazing. Adam, Josh and Trent talked it up. We shared stories and really enjoyed ourselves. Jen’s house is completely Jen. It was full of fashionable, super soft and comfy finds from estate sales and hours, weeks, years of searching for the most perfect accessory.
We drove around and went to a few wineries, Korbel being the best tour and tasting…and it was free. We saw the coast and Bodega Bay with Liza.
Both Jen and Liza cooked my favorite foods. We sifted through not shoe boxes, but 10 gallon plastic bins full of pictures from our childhood. We reminisced like crazy.
It was as if nothing had changed except that we were no longer caddy young girls who fought and made up every other hour.
It’s amazing to me how after all these years; we have known each other for well….27 years…everything is the same. Our interactions, our laughter, the way we know each other and really love each other are so honest and real. I think it was even greater how our newest additions, Harper, Josh, Adam…all fit right in too. There was so much love for each other and respect. It was so easy to all be together.
It seems to me that no matter how much time lapses between our visits (I definitely hope not as long this time) we always fall right back into place.
We left Sebastopol early this morning to head into the city for a few more blocks of walking and picture taking. We are now sitting on the plane…not flying home early because they wanted us to pay money to fly standby even though they had plenty of extra seats which to me is ridiculous. Our plane was a bit delayed but no biggie. Adam and I sat on the tarmac and watched the sunset over San Francisco, definitely after one fantastic vacation.
Now, I sit here and try not to think how in the morning I am flying right back out to deliver Olive to my grandparents and visit a little in Florida while Adam finishes up with Target and cleaning out the apartment….and then, we Yokohama.
How do you build a life around adventure and travel?Intentionally and incrementally. Most families who live this way did not leap from conventional to adventurous overnight. They built remote work capacity, paid down debt, tested longer trips, and had increasingly honest conversations about what they actually want from their lives. The leap feels bigger from outside than from inside.
What does an adventurous family lifestyle actually look like?Different for every family. For some it is long-term travel. For others it is weekend adventures close to home. What connects them is intentionality about how time is spent and a preference for experiences over accumulation. The version that fits your family is the right one.
How do you balance adventure with stability for kids?By finding stability within the adventure rather than treating them as opposites. Routines, rituals, and family rhythms travel with you. Familiar foods, bedtime routines, and predictable family dynamics provide stability even when the location changes. Kids need consistency in relationships more than consistency in geography.
What has travel taught your family?That people are fundamentally similar across cultures in what they want for their families. That comfort zone is a smaller circle than it feels from inside. That the things worth having in life require effort and discomfort to get. And that time together doing hard interesting things is the most reliable source of family closeness.
How do you handle the pressure to live conventionally when you have chosen differently?By getting clear on why you made the choices you made and returning to that clarity when the outside noise gets loud. Most families living unconventionally describe an initial period of explaining themselves that gradually gives way to just living the life. The explaining becomes less necessary as the results become visible.
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[…] later and there was a box waiting from my friend Jenifer in California. I have written about Jen before. We grew up together, from about the age of 6 through middle school. We were like sisters. 3/4 of […]
[…] is a visionary. I have written about her before here and here. She is my oldest friend I have known her since I was 6. This weekend she flew into town to visit […]